Sexuality, Feminism and Our Consumer Culture

Feminism sure has changed since the 1960s. The new “liberated” woman is one who goes to strip clubs with the guys, listens to Howard Stern, undergoes breast augmentation, and either dresses like a Playmate or notices (with appreciation) those who do. The new “feminist” really isn't female at all – she is either trying to be like a cliche from Hooters or simply trying to be one of the guys by going to Hooters with them.

I don’t mean to suggest that guys should be going to strip clubs or Hooters! But there’s something wrong with our understanding of femininity and womanhood if our models are Paris Hilton, Carmen Electra, Jenna Jameson or the cast from Sex and the City. For too many people today, our understanding of sexuality is that it is just another commodity to be used in life. “If you've got it, flaunt it,” could be a mantra of many women today. Never mind your own inner interests and desires in life. Simply use your body and your sexuality to win your way into the club. Or if you are a woman who doesn't “have” it, you learn to admire “hot babes” so that you can be like one of the guys.

This cultural unveils the prevailing selfishness in our society. The women from the hit TV show Sex and the City are unapologetic in their selfishness. They could care less about service to others. In one episode, the character Carrie Bradshaw says, “I don’t believe in the Republican party or the Democratic party… I just believe in parties.” The show demonstrates the insatiable consumption that has become synonymous with the American way of life. For many women who are supposedly “making it” in this world, they seem to think that sex appeal is the primary way to make it. Does this really lead to happiness?

Sex has become another consumable, akin to purses, shoes, food & movies. If you are female, acting “sexy” is just what you are supposed to do to be loved and appreciated. People have no idea what makes sexuality truly fulfilling; they just think it should happen (and often) in order to have fun in life.

Men, we should be ashamed of ourselves for feeding this mentality. Guys, when is the last time you complimented a woman for her wit, for her insight or for her hard work? We have reduced feminism to "being sexy," and many women have bought into our illusion of what makes a woman wonderful.

Parents, though, are just as guilty when they constantly tell their daughters, "You're so pretty." It feeds the neurosis that beauty and hotness matter most.

Consumerism teaches us to use something up and quickly move on. It teaches that we are “entitled” to buy or eat whatever we want. But consumerism does not bring fulfillment or happiness. If you allow Carrie Bradshaw or Paris Hilton to define your idea of sexuality, then you will find nothing but emptiness. God’s way of life is not one of consumerism but one of mutual responsibility. Sex can find its greatest meaning only in a trusting, monogamous relationship.

“You are the salt of the earth. You are the light of world.” (words from Jesus, to his followers)

(Some of my comments above were drawn from Ariel Levy’s book Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture. Ms. Levy is not a Christian, and her book is a bit shocking at points.)