The Good, the Bad & the Ugly about "Thoughts & Prayers"
Why do we pray for people who experience hardship?
There's talk within our broader society about whether we should send "thoughts and prayers" out for those who experience tragedy or who face a crisis.
Is there anything wrong with offering to pray?
The reason for the backlash is that words
frequently come across as empty. I've witnessed the tragedy of empty words. I've been with well-meaning Christians who visit the sick in the hospital or who try to comfort someone during a crisis. I'll most likely cringe if you utter these words, "If there's anything you need, let me know."
Why do I react negatively? I have to qualify that there are a handful of people I know in the world who can say that and be totally genuine about it. But for everyone else, you don't understand the potential price of what you're offering. You may mean well. But too often it's a cliché which confuses being nice with making yourself look good: "Let's do lunch." "Call me if you need anything." "Thoughts and prayers." Your ego deceives you into thinking that such nice offers are about the other person instead of proving how nice you are.
Words are powerful and dangerous. The New Testament writer James has a lot to say about words. "Be careful what you say," he warns. The tongue, he writes, is a restless evil filled with poison, capable of blessing the Father and cursing those made in his image (Jas 3:8-9). How can you use your words for good? Perhaps the best way to help those in need is not to offer to pray but rather to actually pray without announcing that you are doing so. This is a great use of your words.
James teaches about the power of prayer. "The prayer of the righteous is
powerful and effective" (Jas 5:16). Prayer matters! Prayer moves mountains, averts
disasters, heals the sick and brings an end to division. We believe that prayer
really works.
But here's the catch. It's not the "offer of prayers" that
is powerful and effective. It's prayer that is effective. And not just any
prayer. Powerful and effective prayer comes from those whose lives are right
with God.
If you're going to say, "I'm praying for you," that may sound nice. It may look as if you appear to truly care, and perhaps you do. But it's meaningless unless you get your life right with God and then get on your knees to fervently pray for that particular person or need.
So in short, there's nothing wrong with offering to pray. But when you offer to pray, take care that your words are not empty. Real prayer by the righteous works. Be sure to focus on what is effective instead of what looks good.
If you're going to say, "I'm praying for you," that may sound nice. It may look as if you appear to truly care, and perhaps you do. But it's meaningless unless you get your life right with God and then get on your knees to fervently pray for that particular person or need.
So in short, there's nothing wrong with offering to pray. But when you offer to pray, take care that your words are not empty. Real prayer by the righteous works. Be sure to focus on what is effective instead of what looks good.
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